Periodically, it's crossroads time. You know what I mean. I can't help but be sad when it comes, because I'm consistently indecisive by nature. The "what if's" always present themselves, and I get anxious that I'll choose the wrong path for myself. As I often tell my children, the decisions that I [or they] make affect everyone around me. Unless you live on a deserted isle with no one around you, your choices are going to have an impact. That can be bad, but it can also be good. I'm trying to accentuate the positives.
Getting used to having a fifth human being in our home has been delightful and a conundrum all at the same time. Living in a small home always presents challenges, but ultimately we've made it work. I hate clutter, though, and feel like we're about to burst at the seams.
I digress.
Now that our third son has been born, we've had some definite changes. These first four months have been hectic. The first two months, especially, were borderline nightmarish because I'd had four places decide to open up on my incision line, little Joel was suffering from acid reflux, and I was trying to keep up with my pumping schedule.
Now that he's almost five months old now, I'm fully healed, and his reflux is certainly manageable. For almost two months, he's been able to sleep in his crib. No more recliner sleeping for mom or dad!
Writing has been in my head again. It is a never-ending battle to find time to write. It's easy to put it off sometimes, because it's a lot of hard work. Last week though I felt a nudging to begin again. It all happened in four days. On Thursday, I began brainstorming for an Easter story that we need to have written for next Saturday's youth event at church. On Friday, I talked to my mom and she was encouraging me to start writing again. On Saturday, I began writing the Easter story, and on Sunday I finished it. I guess those four days were the kick start that I needed. Now I'm doing research again, getting thoughts together, taking notes, and all that fun stuff. I'm anxious to get the story writing started, but I've learned that it's useless for me to start writing if I've not done my homework. I just hope and pray I can be patient enough to learn what I need to learn and get my prepping done before getting down to the fun stuff.
In addition to writing being on my mind, I've also got to do some research for my son's high school "career". He'll be a freshman in just a few months, and I feel a bit anxious to make sure everything is perfect on my end. All of his school work to this point has been in preparation for these last years. It's quite a nail-biting experience for me. This is the big time for me as the teacher. This is the big time for him as the student to make a good impact on his future. Above and beyond that, though, I want his high school years to be memorable. I want him to have an exciting high school learning experience. Shoot, *I* want to have an exciting high school learning experience with him! Ha!
For now though, the only changes I'm interested in on a large scale are the changes I'm seeing outside. I bought some tulips and daffodils today, and I plan on going outside, grabbing a bag of topsoil and filling pots with beautiful flowers. THAT is the kind of change that I can handle for today!
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