Hospital Bags - What's going!

I've hit the 37 week mark! I have no idea when the baby will come. I've yet to have someone from the OB office suggest that I schedule the appointment for my cesarean. I'm going to ask at my next appointment so that hopefully we can at least have a suggested date. Both my previous births have had spontaneous membrane rupture, but that doesn't mean it'll happen again!

I've got everything ready for the baby to arrive. I'm quite bored now, and the nesting feeling is still there, but there's really very little left to do other than the typical school work with the boys, laundry, dishes, and decluttering. I've read and watched so much TV in my free time that I'm tired of that!

So anyway, I've got the hospital bags done and ready to roll. The only thing that's not done is putting my cell phone charger in my bag. But that can be done as I head out the door.

My Bag

It seems like my hospital bag for this baby is a lot fuller than previous hospital bags. lol I tend to over pack when I go somewhere, so you're seeing the results of that.

- two days' worth of clothes
- pajamas
- socks, including some with tread so I won't fall
- a pair of slip-on shoes to wear home (a $15 find at Walmart)
- toiletries (wash, lotion, deodorant, makeup, brush, hair spray, facial wipes, shampoo/conditioner, hand sanitizer, lip balm, coconut oil for dry skin)
- a hair scrunchy
- candy (of course!)
- Kindle
- my digital camera (not pictured--it was in use hehe)
- a disposable camera (my MIL's purchase in case she can't get to the hospital in time)
- Walmart bags for soiled clothes
- an extra bag for any take-home items that won't fit in my hospital bag

Baby's Bag

I've no idea how much this kiddo will weigh. Hopefully no more than 8 pounds, but my second son weighed 8lbs 3oz at 38 weeks, so if Joel is born at 39 weeks, he might be bigger. I just don't know. So I've got two outfits chosen to take him home in--one newborn size and one 0-3mos. Also included:

- nursing cover
- newborn diapers and wipes
- bibs
- changing pad, washcloth, receiving blanket
- a heavier blanket and heavy receiving banket
- two knitted/crocheted hats
- two pairs of mittens (all my kids have scratched the snot out of their faces at the hospital, so I'm sure this one will too)
- two pairs of booties and some knit booties
- three pairs of socks
- pacifiers
- brush, comb, nail kit
- hand sanitizer

Also I have a nursing pillow ready to roll as well. That was one thing I wished that I'd had at the hospital after my second son was born. Trying to nurse with pillows stacked everywhere isn't the easiest thing in the world, because they slide everywhere.

I also have a bag ready for our boys to take along to the hospital with their DS's, games, a Kindle Fire, and some activity books. We're all set--now, let's get the baby here!!

The Pregnancy Files - Less Than Three Weeks to Go!

I know it's been a long time since I've updated about the pregnancy! It's been fairly uneventful and wonderful!!

Symptoms
Symptoms are pretty typical for thirty-six weeks! The worst is the pelvic floor pain. It hurts to lift my feet to put on my pants or to walk up a few steps or to climb into a vehicle. Putting on and taking off even slip-on shoes sends a zap of pain to my pelvis. Rolling over in bed is very painful. Even sitting down and getting back up is quite painful. I'm limiting my time outdoors now because of the pain. I plan on trips out of the house being no longer than two hours so that I'm not in extreme pain later on.

I get heartburn just like most pregnant women do. Thankfully, it's fairly mild compared to previous pregnancies and typically only rears at night!

I'm still able to wear all of my shoes and my wedding rings. Swelling is very very minimal and on some days completely nonexistant!

Cloth diapering

One cover missing from picture--another yellow one

I've finished the diaper covers I was going to make. I only made five covers just in case there's something about them I want to tweak or change. PUL is expensive and something I don't want to waste! All of my prefold diapers are dyed and ready to go.

We also have some homemade diapers made that aren't shown here because my mom hasn't given them to me yet. I'll share a picture of my full stash once everything is set up and ready to go. I may even make a blog post about how cloth diapering works for us and how I wash the diapers, etc.

Changes
Total Weight Gain: 6 pounds 
Stretch Marks: Still no new ones this pregnancy...yet
Sleep/Insomnia: Sleep-deprived but not quite on an insomnia level
Cravings: Chili and grilled cheese for weeks!
Symptoms: constipation still, pelvic girdle pain
Belly button: Barely an inny!
Wedding rings: Still on! Thank you, Lord!
Looking forward to: BABY!!

Coming Soon!

I hope to make my next post about what's in our hospital bag(s)!

The Pregnancy Files - Less than 100 days to go!

I now have less than a hundred days to go until this baby will be born! Technically, my due date is Nov. 25, but I will likely have a cesarean the week before (unless he decides to come early like his brothers both did), so taking the c-section into consideration, I've probably got about 95-96 days to go! Third trimester is just around the corner!

Things are going fairly well, as well as pregnancy at age 36 can go. I'm still suffering from costochondritis (some days are very very mild and other days are a bit more achy), and I've got symphesis pubis dysfunction, which means that my pelvic bones are very very sore, and it hurts to sit on hard surfaces. Getting up from sitting on said hard surfaces makes it feel like my pelvis is going to break. It will get worse as the baby gets bigger, but I've been through this before so it will be no surprise. Eventually, it will get to the point where I'll be more in bed than I will be up for the last few weeks of pregnancy, because walking, housework, and something as simple as getting in and out of a car is extremely painful. Raising a foot to step into the shower or go up steps feels like the pelvis is going to snap. And heaven help me if I cross my legs!

I spent several days working on cloth diapers with my mom, but we got very little accomplished. We spent the majority of the days discovering that we were doing things wrong, so the last couple of days that we managed to work together, we got three diapers done. Yes, only three! Since then, I've been bombarded with garden produce and canning, so I've not had a single moment to sew. Fortunately, my mom has, and I can't wait to see what she comes up with.

Right now, we're working on finding space for baby gear and baby clothes. Our home is twelve hundred square feet, roughly, and with two adults and two children already living here, we're finding it hard to figure out where we're going to put a crib and baby's clothes. We have no room for an additional dresser, so we're going to have to remove clothes from our dresser to make room for baby's clothes. But that means finding a place to put the clothes we removed from the dresser. We've got every space in closets filled, underneath of the beds taken, and the building is full. And this AFTER we have recently gotten rid of stuff we didn't need! We desperately need to find a bigger place, because we're tripping over boxes of our home-canned food, bags of baby items, and garden produce just laid out on the floor on towels! It looks like a tornado hit our house.

We've been so blessed to have had some baby items brought to us. We've had quite a bit of clothes donated to us, as well as things like some bottles, bibs, shoes, etc. We still need all of the big things like a crib, swing, carseat, etc. but we still have a good bit of time to get those things purchased. We're also not in a hurry, because we have nowhere to put those things! I've been tossing around the idea of going ahead and installing the one carseat that we have simply so we can get it out of hubby's closet so that we can put our canned food in there. But if we install the carseat, then our boys will be cramped before they need to be. :) It's a Catch 22 situation.

We'd wanted to move before we had to unload baby things, but we've just not been able to find what we need within our budget. Most everything that has been within our budget has needed major repairs, and we just can't afford major repairs. So, we're still looking, because we know eventually the right place will pop up and the right situation will present itself. We've learned to be patient about these things.

Changes
Total Weight Gain: 6 pounds
Stretch Marks: No new ones this pregnancy...yet
Sleep/Insomnia: Sleep!
Cravings: Mexican
Symptoms: bloating, some constipation, sporadically swollen fingers
Belly button: Still an inny!
Wedding rings: Still on!
Exciting happening(s) this week: Delivery of homeschool curriculum, dejunking the house
Looking forward to: Doctor appointment next week, and I think I'm supposed to have an ultrasound?

25 Week Development
Your little grower’s physical proportions are pretty much birth-ready and most of their remaining development will largely be weight gain and a ton of nervous system development. Head to heels, your baby now measures about 13 1/2 inches. Weight — 1 1/2 pounds — isn't much more than an average rutabaga, but he's beginning to exchange the long, lean look for some baby fat. As he does, his wrinkled skin will begin to smooth out and he'll start to look more and more like a newborn. He's also growing more hair — and if you could see it, you'd now be able to discern its color and texture.

The Pregnancy Files - Halfway There!

Today I'm 21 weeks and 4 days. It seems like it has taken forever to get this far, and it feels like I still have a very long way to go. Having said that, summer has passed so quickly! It's amazing how much time passes when you're busy, and this summer has been one of those times.

The last time that I wrote about this pregnancy, I was 14 weeks along. At that point, I'd only been feeling movement for a little over a week, and that was very sporadic and wasn't every day. Now I'm feeling movement every day, multiple times a day, but it's still very light except for the occasional pummel.

Also, since that last update, we found out that we're TEAM BLUE again! I knew it! This is the only time that I have ever been correct about the gender of one of my kids. I just had this gut feeling that this was a boy. At seventeen weeks, I had an ultrasound after I'd had a slight scare. The tech had told me she thought she saw little boy parts but to not trust her judgment, because she might be wrong. But then two weeks later, during my 20 week scan (which was done at 19w1d), it was quickly confirmed that baby is a boy!

Little Baby J, who has been dubbed "Skeletor" because of this image. :P

Since finding out that Baby J is a boy, we haven't done much shopping. We've had some things handed down to us, and that helps a lot. We have a lot still to buy yet, but we're not in a hurry. I bought one set of boy-themed items to announce his gender and shared it on Facebook, but other than that I still haven't done a whole lot of shopping yet for clothes and other items. Save for one thing....

Pre-fold diapers! This image is a bundle of thirteen Indian pre-fold diapers that I've slowly been throwing into our towels and whites washes so that the diapers can shrink down to their proper size and become absorbent. I still have another dozen that need to begin the washing process. This is my first time cloth diapering, and after my second son's constant rounds of rashes and prescription-grade diaper rash cream, I decided to make baby's life a little gentler (though my life a little more hectic by all of the washing) and do something a bit different.

I also plan on doing a bit of sewing some regular diapers. With the help (and patterns) of my dear friend Steph from Pampered Cheeks, I've got a good head-start. I just have to get all of the fabric bought, cut, and sewn. In other words, I've not started sewing yet. lol

So far I'm not having any complications in pregnancy, other than your standard, run-of-the-mill stuff. I still am dealing with costochondritis, though it is mild and I've not had to take any Tylenol for it. I'm hoping it stays that way, though with baby moving up closer and closer to my ribs, I feel like I'm not going to get a break for long. I've not been doing my relaxation exercises at all and haven't for months, and I need to get back into that. Totally my fault that it's not getting better. My lower back pain has actually been better since I hit second trimester, but I have occasional flare-ups.

Baby's stats right now:
-Weighs roughly 12 ounces
-Length about 10.5 inches long head to toe, or about 7-8 inches head to rump
-Growth is slowing down so that fat can start to accumulate under the skin and organs, while fully formed, are maturing
-Baby hears sounds and responds to them
-Eyelids and eyebrows are formed

The Pregnancy Files

We're expecting baby number three!! You who know me on Facebook already know about our baby who is due sometime in mid-to-late November. After our surprise pregnancy last year which ended almost as soon as I'd found out, when I found out about this baby, I was nervous. I almost steeled my heart because I was afraid to get attached. I was afraid to get excited. And I guess that still remains to a small degree. I tested with five pregnancy tests over a six-day time-frame because I wanted to see if the lines got darker. With the last loss, they didn't. Knowing that I had progression going on, that helped give me some hope that maybe things would be ok.

Almost immediately I began having nasty lower back pain. I went to the ER, fearing the worst. They did beta hcg panel and did an internal ultrasound. I was only four weeks along at the time, and I told the doctor that, but he must have misunderstood what I was saying, because he told me that because nothing was on the ultrasound (and you WON'T see anything at four weeks), and my hcg was only 439 (I think that was the number), I was likely to miscarry. But they gave me some antibiotics because they also suspected UTI. I was a basket-case. We had told no one--no friends, no family--because of the possibility that we'd suffer another loss, so hubby and I had no one to talk to but each other. I cried, and he prayed, and we were just generally miserable for three days, when I had a follow-up hcg panel, which revealed a very nice doubling hcg. The doctor also suspected an intrauterine pregnancy, so I was thrilled. A week later, we had an ultrasound which revealed baby was measuring 5 weeks, 6 days, with a heartbeat of 95. Because of the lower heartbeat (which is often very normal at that time), I was in a panic again. I checked google, and found that most women measuring around that time had babies whose heartbeats were higher, but there were some that measured just like our baby did. Still, I wasn't settled.

It wasn't until my ten week appointment that I saw the baby again on ultrasound. It was moving and kicking and waving its little hands. The heartbeat was a nice 164. I finally felt like things were going to be ok and I calmed down.

We finally announced it to everyone at that point.

A week and a half later, I was back at the OB office with that nasty back pain again. I saw the baby on ultrasound again because it was still a little too early to hear on the doppler, and the heartbeat was 174. I was diagnosed with lumbar issues and issued a prescription for a custom-made lumbar support belt. I'll be stylin' now!! :P

I've hit fourteen weeks now, and I'm feeling a lot of movement. I bought a cheapy Angelsounds doppler that I use once a week (on the weeks I don't have an appointment) just to hear the heartbeat. It's a lot of fun to hear it, and even though I can feel it kicking, it's also fun to hear the boom-boom of the kicks against the doppler and the chug-chug of the heartbeat. It's been in the mid-140s lately, so it has calmed down from the original 160-170 heartbeat that it had early on. At first I thought that maybe I'd have another high-wired child like my first son (his heartbeat was always in the upper 150s-160s), but now this one seems to be trending like my second son did. Yay for laid-back babies!!! One can hope, right? ;)

I plan on regularly updating as the pregnancy progresses. I've never documented a pregnancy before like this, so it will be a lot of fun.

Life Afterward - It's ok to talk

In three days, it will be two months since I found out that we were expecting a third child. I waited until now to write about it all, because--frankly--it's been too hard to write about. I've been too angry, bitter, sad--you name it. I think it's safe to say now that I'm healing well emotionally.

There are days that I think about what it would have been like. This Saturday I would have reached the thirteen week mark. No doubt, like his/her brothers, I'd have felt movement by now. At first, each Saturday that marked a new week brought grief and despair. Sundays were awful, because everything fell apart on a Sunday.

It's strange the depth of emotion that losing a baby brings. One day, I would be a heaping mass of tears and sobbing. The next day I would be fine, and that made me feel so guilty. Brad felt the same way. I almost felt during that first couple of weeks like I had to grieve for a certain amount of time, because if I didn't, I would be a horrible person. But I didn't make myself grieve--trust me, it came whether I wanted it to or not.

For the first two weeks, phone calls were awful to bear. If someone called, I cried. It was inevitable. Talking about losing the baby was just unbearable. Talking about it made it more real, and part of me wanted to deny it. At one point about a month afterward, I felt like it had all not been real. I had only known that I was pregnant for four days before things fell apart. I'd not had enough time to really feel like the pregnancy was real before I found out that it was over. The emotions from the loss are all over the place. I can't begin to explain to someone who's not experienced it how it literally takes over your mind. Everything else fades in importance. Retreating inward. Eating, eating, eating in my grief. No one had to worry that I'd starve to death--no, I responded in the opposite way. The scale bears witness.

The physical pain was quite awful. On Mother's Day when I went to the ER and was told that I was miscarrying, I went home and tried to accept it. The pain was maddening. It hurt to sit--it felt like I was sitting on a knife, especially if I sat on a hard surface. Days went by, and I saw my ob/gyn. Had two ultrasounds which neither confirmed a sac anywhere. It was unofficially determined that I had an ectopic pregnancy. No idea where the baby landed. That explained my pain.

D&C. Methotrexate. Sent home to heal. And wait. I didn't realize that it would take so long for hCG to lower. My hCG was so low--only got as high as 89--but it took three weeks to get back down to 0. No folate, no vitamins. Methotrexate depletes the folate in the body so that fetal tissue that is remaining is reabsorbed by the mother's body. I didn't realize how much food had folate, and it was frustrating to not be able to eat any of it until my hCG was 0. Three weeks eating chicken and rice, crackers, and cheese. And lots of prunes. I think you can figure out why with that diet.

For a month after the D&C, I had pain. A good portion of the pain was in the area of my ovaries, and it would come and go. Sharp little needle-like sensations that would show up, and then ebb away. And then there was the cramping that was similar to post-partum cramping. And I learned that methotrexate causes a lot of abdominal pain. You'd better believe it. Some days I remained in my recliner for hours. Some days I didn't want to get out of bed.

This week, my ob/gyn gave me the all-clear. I'm back to normal now physically, and now I feel like I can move on. People have told me that I never will forget. That there will be times when I'll just cry. The due date--January 12--may be a hard day. Mother's Day will always be hard, because that was when I lost the baby. I take comfort in the fact that my little one is with my Lord. That makes it easier for me to bear, even though it hurts that I'll never get to hear his/her first cries, watch it make bubbles out of saliva, make little cooing sounds or watch in fascination as Jacob plays the Star Wars theme on the piano. (Because any child of mine would HAVE to love Star Wars, right? :P) But it's ok--my mind takes me to heaven where one day I'll see that little person that is a part of me and a part of Brad and hug him/her and have forever to talk and laugh.

And now, it's ok to talk about losing the baby. I want to talk about the baby. I think there's this unspoken understanding that I sense among some that a miscarriage is not a real loss. That there's nothing that can be done, and so you should just accept it and snap out of it. Does someone just accept and snap out of it when a relative dies? A spouse? A child? Of course not. To suggest that a woman shouldn't grieve the loss of her unborn child is insensitive. No one is going to tell me that I can't talk about my child that I lost.

Have you suffered a miscarriage or an ectopic pregnancy? Don't be silent! Share your story with me--share your pain, your own "what ifs", your life afterward.

It's not Goodbye; It's See You Later

*Warning: If you're tender-hearted and don't like gut-wrenching stories, don't read this. I'm bearing my grief in my own way.

If you were looking for my update yesterday about my weight loss, there's a good excuse for why I didn't update. Shoot, I didn't even keep up with the diet for a very good reason.

On Wednesday, I found out that I was expecting. It was quite the surprise! We have two children--12 and 7, and we weren't planning to have another. I just felt odd that day, and we went out and I bought a pregnancy test. The boys had no idea what I'd bought, because I didn't see a need to tell them if it was negative, and I strongly suspected it was. So, I came home, did my thing, and straightened the bathroom while I was waiting. A minute later, there was a definite line. I was surprised--no, SHOCKED!--and worried at the same time. Where were we going to put this child? We live in a 3-bedroom trailer where all the bedrooms are in use. Our contract here where we live states that we cannot have more than four individuals living in the home. That meant we'd have to move. What about pregnancy complications? I'd had pre-eclampsia with my first child. Since I'm already overweight, I worried about what complications that might cause. And I worried about how achy I would be, since I'll turn 35 this year.

But I was happy. I went out to the living room where the boys were sitting. I pointed at one and said, "You're a big brother." Then I pointed at the other and said, "You're a big brother." They looked at me strangely, and they both realized that the younger brother couldn't be a big brother. So I crooked my finger at them and told them to follow me where I showed them the pregnancy test and told them what it meant.

The babying began. Especially from Jacob--every few minutes he'd ask if I needed more water or if I wanted something to eat. He even took a walk with me around the neighborhood and we talked about how neat it would be for him to be a big brother.

That afternoon, Jacob had a baseball practice, and so I prepared some special t-shirts for their dad to see.

They were both so excited and kept hugging me the whole day. At the baseball practice, my oldest son had his back to his dad, so my husband didn't see his shirt. It was only when my youngest came to us to get his batting gloves that Brad saw the shirt and was perplexed. Then he asked Daniel to turn around, and when he saw what it said, he grinned and said, "Are you pregnant?"

Of course, the news snowballed. The boys wore their t-shirts to church, and no one figured it out until we were leaving.

We called both of our parents that night, and told them the news. It was my dad's birthday, and I knew that it was news he'd never forget.

However, that was the happy day. Things began to go a little south after that.

While everyone was having their own little thoughts about our news ("Where are you going to live?", "Mom, I'm so excited you're having a baby!", "Babe, I'm already tired, and we don't even HAVE the baby yet," "We just worry about you".....), I was cramping. Not anything drastic, but it just felt different. It hurt to sit down on the baseball bleachers--I knew that wasn't normal. My back was cramping a good bit. Even as early as Wednesday evening, I was feeling a sixth sense that something wasn't right.

I didn't announce anything on Facebook, and I didn't tell many people. Brad and Jacob were doing that for me. *grin* I just felt like it was too early to tell anyone, especially with what I had going on, so I just didn't do it.

On Friday, I had some light brown discharge along with the cramping and just about freaked. I spent most of the day researching my symptoms online, trying to comfort myself that everything was ok. I'd already made an appointment to see the OB, but I wouldn't be getting in to see someone until June 5--a whole month away.

On Saturday, I only had a little bit of cramping, but that whole day I felt like I was in Twilight Zone, because I felt almost normal. It scared me. My body almost felt normal again--I wasn't feeling that little hint of nausea I'd felt since Tuesday. I tried not to worry, but in my mind that gut feeling was playing again. It felt like a broken record--"something's wrong, something's wrong, something's wrong". I didn't say much to anyone, because I was trying to convince myself that this feeling I was having was wrong. I wasn't bleeding, right? That's the telltale sign, and I didn't have that.

Sunday morning, Brad announced the baby to our Sunday School class. Again, I heard that broken record, but I put on my little smile and forged ahead. After Sunday School was when it began. I had Brad take me home, and we left the boys in the hands of a friend of ours and headed home. It was Mother's Day. I should be celebrating being a new mom, but I was sitting on the toilet knowing that something was definitely not right. I was watching things fall into the toilet that should not be there. I was realizing that my gut feeling was not wrong. I cried and I cried and I cried. Brad and I sobbed and held each other. Brad asked if it was ok for him to call his parents, and I said yes. I knew that I couldn't call mine--I could barely hold it together to talk to my husband, so I knew that making a phone call wasn't going to happen.

I talked to my mother-in-law and she suggested I go to the emergency room. By that time, we had the boys back, and so off we went. Blood drawn, urine sample, transvaginal ultrasound that was horrifically painful, and a pelvic examination. All while bleeding heavily. I knew. They didn't have to tell me. My beta (hCG) level was 36. After finding out that I was pregnant on Wednesday, the level should be in the thousands by now. The news wasn't devastating, because I already knew. I knew on Wednesday that something wasn't right.

But as much as I was prepared all week for this simple bit of confirmation, I was not prepared to give up my child. All week, I'd been clinging to the hope that everything would be ok. I was hoping against my gut feeling that the pregnancy would go to term. I would do whatever it would take--bed rest all nine months, drink some kind of ghastly medicine every day, stand on my head while saying the alphabet backwards! I would do whatever it took to make this happen. But it wasn't going to happen.

We came home and cried some more. I've never cried so hard in my life, I have never seen Brad cry so hard in his life. We both look like we've been hit in the eyes. My eyes are bloodshot, the skin around my eyes are so swollen I look like I have had an allergic response to something.

Brad said yesterday that we need to come up with a name for the baby--something to help us find closure. And we need to put the boys' t-shirts and the pregnancy tests in a memory box just like we put our boys' baby things in a memory box. Because, this is not just a failed pregnancy. This is our child. Just because I was only 4 weeks pregnant doesn't mean that it was any less a baby. What it DOES mean is that we've got a little one waiting on us in heaven. It means that we've got three grandmothers in heaven to chit-chat with our baby, to tell it all about us while we can't. It means that the first face our little one saw was Jesus. It means that it won't be here to suffer.

Even though we are so heartbroken, we're still trucking along, because we put our faith in One who knows the beginning from the ending, the whys and the reasons for all things. God knows our grief and our sorrow, and we rest knowing that He knows what's best. And that's all I need.

To my sweet baby,
I mourn the fact that I won't get to hold you here, see who you look like, or smell your sweet baby breath. I won't get to hear the sweet baby sounds that you'd make or rock you to sleep. But you'll be loved for as long as I live, and I will never forget what it meant to me to realize that I was having you.

Your big brother Jacob knows that he's still a big brother, even though you won't be here. And he's taken back his title of Cuddle Monkey in your place, because he knows that my lap is going to be lonely.

Your dad was looking forward to having you. He was already making plans for how we would rearrange our home. Our home will be always empty without you.

And while I'll miss you for always, I'll carry you forever. You'll always have a place in my heart, my thoughts, and my life. The days right now are full of grief and tears, but one day your memory will be easier to bear, and I'll look forward to meeting you up There where I'll get to spend eternity knowing your personality, your laughter, and your smile.

Daddy, Daniel, Jacob and I will miss you. We'll always remember the day you should have been born. And we'll always call you our Victory, because you have the victory now. It's been won, and no doubt there's a Celebration going on over your entry into the Kingdom. You deserve it, and we look forward to the day where we'll get to celebrate with you.

We love you, Victory Celebration.
Love forever,
Mommy

So when this corruptible shall have put on incorruption, and this mortal shall have put on immortality, then shall be brought to pass the saying that is written, Death is swallowed up in victory. 1 Corinthians 15:54

But thanks be to God, which giveth us the victory through our Lord Jesus Christ. I Corinthians 15:57

For whatsoever is born of God overcometh the world: and this is the victory that overcometh the world, even our faith. 1 John 5:4